Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Whoops! I just killed Dora!

It's not that I'm psychotic (well, not really). But some days I just get so sick of the characters on Children's TV, that I would really like to see them killed off.

They kill off characters on TV shows all the time! Neighbours, The Bold and The Beautiful, Home and Away... Why not kids shows too?
So rather than put my foot through my TV screen, I've decided to kill them off in prose.

Just imagine that annoying little Dora,

The one who explores at great pace.

If her purple backpack contained no oxygen,

and her map sent her exploring deep space!

Then there's those helium filled rodents,
Who go by the name "Chipmunks".
If they were hired to sing on an arctic cruise,
And an evil iceberg got them all sunk!

The ballet dancing, tutu wearing mouse,
The one they call Angelina Ballerina,
Disappears when pirouetting past Swan Lake,
... and since then nobody's seen her.

Pat was the eternally chirpy postman,
But Jess his black and white cat,
didn't guess where the bomb was hidden,
Now he's called Roastman Pat.

(Roastman Pat, Roastman Pat, Roastman Pat and his BBQ'd cat)

Poor old Dorothy the Dinosaur,
She was the last of her kind you see,
But now she's extinct like the rest of them.
Someone had poisoned her rosy tea.

Lastly those pyjama clad brothers,
Known as B1 and B2,
Were last seen running away from,
some gorillas who'd escaped from the zoo.

Do you have a kids TV character that you don't like that you'd like to see killed off? Or do you like all the characters on children's TV?